It doesn’t have to be a fight.

I started in benefits at a transit authority with a thousand employees and five unions. Most of my early years were spent explaining plans: what a plan covered, how the retirement plan worked, what someone needed to do when life changed.

Somewhere along the way, the union presidents started asking for me. When contracts came up for renewal and benefits were on the table, they wanted me in the room. I was a benefits specialist. I didn’t run the negotiations, and nobody expected me to be the one they wanted to hear from. But they asked, so the director started bringing me in.

I’ve thought a lot about why. I think it’s because I’d spent time with them one-on-one, long before anything was at stake. I was careful about what I said; I worked for management, and they knew that. But I wasn’t there to fight them. Most of those presidents had been drivers themselves. They’d lived the split shifts and the Saturdays, and they understood things about the job that nobody in our office had ever had to learn. When they came in frustrated, they were usually right about something, even when I couldn’t give them what they asked for.

That trust changed how the hard conversations went. Negotiation is easier when the people across the table believe you. Even when they asked for something we could never do, they could read it on my face before I said a word, and we could get on with what was possible.

Most companies never build that kind of relationship, because it takes time and HR is in the office. The people on the floor know why someone quit in week eight, which change is about to cost you good people, and what they’d fix first. They’ll tell you, but only if they believe you’re listening and that something will come of it.

Heardby is my attempt to make that possible beyond what one person can reach. It asks the questions I used to ask in break rooms and union halls, in a way people can answer honestly. It only shows what at least five people said, so nobody is singled out. And it asks you to answer back, in your own words, and then asks the crew whether it happened.

It won’t build the relationship for you. You still have to show up, keep the promise, and fix the small thing this week. But it can show you where to start, and it can show your people that someone is finally asking.

It doesn’t have to be a fight. I’ve seen it not be one.

Joe Kim

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